Vela mela vela...

Whom do you think uses his (saripaa samathuvavaathigala, his/her) brain more? The one who keeps his eyes glued to the monitor and his fingers to the keyboard, burning his ‘seat’ off? The one who sees to that the coffee machines keep working harder than himself? The one who goes home once in a while just to make sure that his family doesn’t forget him, and he, his family and address? Or is it the lively one who rarely warms his seat and keeps spreading light of his love and wisdom across cabins, irrespective of the high walls in between?

Did you say – the one who warms his seat the most uses the brain the most? Well, if you say, hotter the seat is, better the brain, you are terribly wrong. May be, he uses his bum more than he uses his brain. Just doing what you are told is not as hard as it seems. You know what you got to do and how to do what you got to do. But, just think about the minority that is left to create work for itself. Imagine how hard the brains of those elite few have to work to keep them occupied. Now, you will realize whose brain works harder.

Okay, a little christening exercise now. In desi Dilbertesque ishtyle, we’ll call the hard-workers, seat-warmers, and the other intelligent minority, heart-warmers. I think I don’t have to discuss about seat-warmers, as I am sure most of you would be one of them and know much more about them than me. So, now that you realize that your bum is burning, before you rush off to cool it down, read through the rest of the post to know what it takes to be a heart -warmer.

You might have heard such comments on heart-warmers more often than not. “The company pays you to keep you from working. Your pay is to insure against the disaster – your work.” – trying to imply “You are good for nothing and your work sucks”, but essentially thinking “You must be too smart to be like this”. This is just a collective whine from the dumb masses which make up the seat-warming community.

But, the truth is management values the heart-warmers more than the other species. Not everybody can be made a heart-warmer. You need exceptional creativity to be one. Kudutha velaiya seirathu kashtam illa, kudukkatha velaya seirathu thaan kashtam. Plain and simple.

So the next time, you ask heart-warmers “Enna innikkum vettiyaa?”, just realize how DUMB you are to be a seat-warmer and more than anything, the management very well knows that.

Remember the old advert for polio eradication featuring Rajnikanth that used to be aired in the mid-80s, especially during the Sunday night movies?

“Maan maathiri thullittu pora intha kulanthaiya paarunga. Intha kuzhanthaiyaiyum paarunga. Intha nelama unga kulanthaiku varaama irukka polio drops podunga”

Need I say more on this?

Your seat/heart warming capacity is heavily dependent on what your parents told you about work and how naïve you were to believe all of that.

Work is worship? Then what is God? Idleness. Of course, you all very well know that God created the world in six days and on the seventh day, He rested. Do you get it?

Be Idle, Be God.